If you are going through a divorce that involves kids, this can be a stressful time. While you might be busy working through what your family's needs will be in the future, it can be easy to lose sight of your children's immediate emotional needs and questions. Here are four questions that that might be pressing to your children that should be discussed during a pending divorce.
1. Is Divorce My Fault?
You know that your divorce isn't your children's fault, but your child might need some reassurance. While it might seem obvious to you, telling your children that they aren't the reason for your split is important. It is worth it to talk with your children and settle any lingering doubts right away so your child will never harbor guilt about your divorce.
2. How Will My Things be Divided Up?
Another issue that might seem pressing to children is how their items will be divided up. While you know that kids can have items at two homes and that new TVs, personal items, and toys can be replaced and duplicated, your child might not. When it comes to pets, their permanent homes will need to be decided on as a family. When it comes to dividing up household items, make this a conversation that your kids are involved in and can help with the decision-making process.
3. Will I Still See Both of My Parents?
Custody decisions might be somewhat out of your control when it comes to divorce settlements. If you and your ex-spouse can be open and honest with your kids about your thoughts and hopes for visitation, this will help. If your split is more contentious, reassure your children that both parents will still be in their lives, even if not under one roof.
4. Where Will I Live?
Even if you are still hammering out the details of which parent will stay in the home or if both parents will be moving, assure your child that their needs will be taken care of. Your children should know that they will always have a place to call home. While there might be some initial uncertainty while hammering out details, let you child know you will keep them involved in any changes and moving arrangements as they come.
Divorce can be hard on kids in ways that parents sometimes misinterpret or don't fully consider. It is best to head off common questions right away with your kids. If you can get open communication going and also have a united front with your ex, your kids will be more confident and not feel so alone during the divorce process.
For a divorce lawyer, contact a lawyer such as Kenneth J. Molnar Attorney.